Have you ever had one of those moments where all you wanted to do was just scream? Where life is going on all around you, and you have decided you have had enough for the day? That was me today.
From the time I woke up, my grumpy pants were on. Stressed, annoyed, stressed, not being a very kind wife, not remembering to watch my tongue, just...one of THOSE days. Even as words were flying out of my mouth, I saw myself looking from the outside in. They weren't very kind or loving. They weren't edifying or encouraging.
I went about my day. I apologized to my handsome man. I went to 3-4 different jobs. At the end of my day, I went home. And immediately stepped right back out. I felt the gentle nudge. I needed to fix my heart and my attitude.
As I drove towards our little garden, I hear my heart and mind just waiting for that moment when I can be outside and listen to the sunshine and wind. And be still. I finished up in the garden and I heard that whisper again. "Go take a walk. "
As I'm walking the short trail, I feel the pressure building up. One fall, then two. The tears just leaking down my face. My heart pouring out all of it...the stress, fear, doubt, worry, pain. I stop and sing my heart out, tears falling even more steady. "Jesus, Jesus". That's about all I can whisper out. I sing the lyrics to my favorite Misty Edwards song. And then, I listen.
"Beloved, it's time." I know exactly what that means. And I'm afraid. It's time to let go of the last 10 years. It's time to let Him do something new. It's been exactly 40 days that He and I have been working on a few heart issues. It's been 40 days of searching, seeking, questioning, asking. And in those 40 days, today I realized I was trying to hang on so tight to the past. I have been so fearful of what this new future looked like, that I didn't see how broken I had become holding on to something that I was supposed to let go. It wasn't what He wanted for me.
Sometimes in our lives, we need to go take a walk. We need time away from everything and everyone that surrounds us so we can clearly hear what HE has to say. In those times I find He speaks to our hearts, broken or whole, because He wants to heal. Have you gone for a walk yet? Have you allowed yourself time to hear His voice away from the chaos in order to heal/hear/love?
On my walk, He showed me a picture of this cut tree. 
It doesn't look like a significant thing, right? But look at the life that's growing around it! Though it was pruned, life and growth happened. That's what happened today on my walk. He reminded me that the pruning seasons are good and to my benefit. And sometimes, we need to take a walk to be able to hear Him clearly.
This next picture...see all the thorns? This little guy was in my way. If I wasn't careful, I'd be scratched and possibly stuck with a few thorns on me. Strange thing, His voice. When I came to that little tree, I was reminded that on our path, there's always going to be obstacles, things, issues, whatever you want to call them. But the great thing is, when we take a walk with Him, when we commune with Him, He's pretty good about giving us a heads up. "Hey love, ya might not want to go this way. It doesn't lead to My best for you."
I'm glad that I'm once again being reminded of His best for me. I don't know about you, but when life happens, I tend to lose sight of that. I tend to see the obstacles, the stress, the crazy. Instead, I need to see Him. I need to hear His voice and feel the wind and sunshine.
Here's to taking a few more walks with Him.
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