What I learned building a bookcase

1. I'm smart, but apparently not smart enough to understand written directions.  (See, teachers, are always told you I was visual!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

2. I still have a tendency to cuss a lot express my feelings in such a way that, uh, does not bring glory to Jesus.  This tendency comes out more so when I can't understand written directions.  Or am very very very very very very frustrated.

3. I will endure much pain to get my objective/goal done.  As discovered by the numerous time I hit my thumb nail every time I attempted to hammer in those damn nails.  By golly I was going to get that stupid bookcase built if my roommate found me lying on the floor in a rocking puddle of mess because I tore it to pieces in my frustration.  (That's real talk for ya! haha)

4. I still struggle with patience.  Despite people telling me I'm patient, I know that I have a LONG way to go.  As experienced by numbers 1-3.

5. Even in my frustration and "expression of feelings", I still kept praying.  More on the lines of, "Jesus, THIS IS GOING TO WORK.  I AM NOT TAKING IT BACK JUST BECAUSE I SCREWED UP."  Yes, I did scream at Jesus.  And gave Him several dirty looks while praying.  (I have yet to see the humor in the knowledge that I have a great brain for math and science, but suck at written directions.)

6. Goes along w/ #5...I'm realizing more and more that in seasons of frustration, no matter the type of frustration, be it temptations, literal frustration, struggle, praise, whatever...more and more I am turning to Him, my best friend.  If you haven't realized it yet, I talk to Him like I do my best friend.  No matter where I'm at, I constantly hear His whispers/responses, even if that response is silence.  This, in seasons of hard times, has given me the greatest comfort.

7. I was not made to do things by myself.  You see, I know, my roommate knows, and several of my closest friends know: I have been banned from ever putting together a bookcase.  Or hanging up curtain rods/curtains. I apparently can't seem to manage a straight line, straight hammer, straight nail, straight screws...I just have issues w/ straight things apparently.  But me in my pride, I wanted to prove to myself and others that I wasn't a total screw up in this area.  So, instead of waiting for help, which I had asked for from a friend, I decided to take this journey on my own.  Which led to numbers 1-5.

8. And lastly, when it's all said and done, and the bookcase was put together...I realized that He still loves me.  Even in all my bad tendencies.  I used to get down on myself soooooo much every time I screwed up.  I thought I had to be perfect.  Do things perfectly.  Have everything JUST RIGHT when I did certain things.  I'm realizing more and more, lately, that I don't have to be perfect.  I can just be me.  In all my mess, He loves me. And He loves my messiness--inside and out.  On days I don't get things done quite the way I wish, He still loves me.

What an awesome God I serve.  What an awesome God I love.

Oh, and another lesson learned:

To bask in the mistakes made.  Why bask, you ask?  Because the mistakes give me a chance to ask Him how to go about things His way instead of mine.  With that being said, even if you've veered off the path a little, get back on, get back up, ask Him where to go, and try again. :)

My prayer for you:

That in all your messiness, you realize just how much He loves you: worts, mess and all.  He won't love you any less.  In my opinion, I think He'll love you more.  Why?  Because you've chosen to be honest with Him when you give Him and show Him your mess.

Love to each one of you. :)